Missed a day

It was bound to happen— I have already missed a day.  I suppose I can take pleasure in the fact that I am , in fact, improving.  Last year or the year before, I missed November 1st.  That year I posted on the 2nd, thinking it was the 1st, and only later realized my mistake.  This year I made it a whole two days!

That said, it gives me the opportunity to practice a skill that I am working on: forgiving myself.

I cannot be everything to everyone.  I cannot be everywhere all the time.  I can’t see the future and avoid mistakes that at the time made sense.  I can’t protect myself from making friends with people who end up not being worthy of the friendship.  I cannot give up eating cookies and be happy at the same time. I cannot be superwoman at work and supermom at home and have the house clean.  I am accepting that the only reason my house is clean is because of the amazing Liza who cares for it.

My dress from a Charity Gala for an LGBT shelter, May 2016

The Marine Ball is coming up and so are the inevitable questions about dresses.  This is one area where I have always excelled: I forgive my body and its failings.  I accept that I have a sweat tooth and don’t like physical activity.  My body grew and amazing, smart, brave girl inside of it and has never really recovered. I strongly believe that dresses should be comfortable; that you should be able to sit, eat, and dance in them without worry; and that if your old dresses don’t fit your current body, you should buy or rent a new dress.

I need to apply this logic, this forgiveness, this acceptance of me in other areas too.  Who knew that personal growth would take so much work and so many pep talks!


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