I spend weekdays from 8:30-12 and 13:00-17:00 furiously focusing on my work so that I can run out that door and get home to the most important person in my life.
I spend the rest of my evening, also early mornings, lunches, and weekends focused on my little bundle of joy. How much can we build today? How often should we go to the park? How many play dates and friends can we fit in? How many times can you wash your hands over the course of an hour? How long until we learn all the words to the next song? And, did we remember to feed the dog? Cook something nutritious? Buy milk?
I answer question after question. Sometimes I lose my temper and want a break. I hug her harder. Sometimes, I pull out my iPhone when I shouldn’t. Sometime, I just don’t want to wash hands again.
I am balancing. I am balancing home life and work life. I am balancing, but I am not balanced. There is very little me time in there. Few moments when I actually selflessly think about me. When I do, I either feel guilty or end up tired because they are crowding out sleep.
Here is what I need to do:
- Get enough sleep.
- Read more.
- Spend less time shopping online for things I don’t need
- Exercise (perhaps wagon walks with the dog and daughter after sunset or yoga over lunch)
- Remind myself that I can’t be everything to everyone and that that is ok
- Cuddle on the couch and pet the dog
- 5 minutes to just breath
- A massage every once in a while
- More play dates
- Keep blogging